One day I journeyed to Lagos on a visit to a friend who just got married. Due to Lagos traffics I arrived later the time I told them, late in the night.
Since I already knew their home address so I went straight to their home, I didn't burder to call again.
This was a surprised to them as I met the newly married couples in their worst of moods. Arguing, fighting and assaulting each other.
I stood on the door post few minutes before a knocked on the door, before this time I already overheard their disputes. I became a messiah to them that night.
But I asked, what happened?, the husband replied, " I can't allow my wife to be a salary earner while I am one already. I don't want her to do anything at all. I want her to stay in my home , take care of my children, wash my clothes and manage the home."
I asked the wife, she said, " I will never be a house wife, not in my dreams, not even in awaking life."
I was aghast, I purposely refused to say a thing. I was scared not to separate the latest couples.
With what I saw that night, although I'm a bachelor but, these are the things I know about marriage;
Marriage is seen to be a socially accepted union of individuals in husband and wife roles with the key function of legitimation of parenthood (Reiss 1980).
On this note, marriage is not supposed to be a union of two people where one boss the other.
Nowadays, where majority of men want to be all in all, so doing, they end up being a fool of one self by sitting on the head of their wife.
Most men don't allow their wife to work just to keep them under their subjection.
Some men do this so they can cheat on their wife.
If a man's wife is beautiful the husband will not allow her to work so that her beauty will not depreciate.
Some men do this to prove to their wife how much they love them but ,such love is fake.
Some husbands will do this to show how rich and hard working they are but , such endeavour is weak and illiteracy.
Some men do this because their understanding to who a wife is, is limited to child bearing.
To some husbands that are in a secret society, they will never allow their wife to work just to gain total control over them.
At times husbands do these for influential purpose.
Some men do these because they want to show up themselves to be a talk of the town.
These people don't know the true meaning of marriage. It is true they say, much learning does not teach men to be wise.
Neither do abundance of knowledge give men understanding.
However, the wisdom of men does not please God.
So therefore, wisdom is not acquired from bravery but through the urge to learn even from fools.
And I say, as a wife untill you are disasstified with your position you will never move forward.
Furthermore, before marriage consider compatibility, know the person you want to marry.
Marriage seminar, counselling, reading and fervent prayer will be a better way out.
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